Our Lady of Fatima for the clueless!

Love this 4 minute video, since it pretty much tells you everything you need to know about Fatima in, well, 4 minutes!  Watch it if you have no idea what I am talking about.  I promise you will be intrigued even if you aren't Catholic.

Why I love Bible Study

           "He opened their minds so they could understand the Scriptures." Luke 24:45


I just completed my second year of Bible study and feel a huge sense of accomplishment!  I have now studied, in depth, The Gospel of John and The Acts of the Apostles. The rewards have far outweighed the effort I put into it and I look forward to our class starting again in the fall.
When I signed up for it 2 years ago, I had no idea how it would change my life.  I had no knowledge of scripture beforehand and frankly, if I tried to crack open the Bible, I would be bored to tears.  My only exposure to God's Word was at Mass and it didn't sink in for me.  It sounded pretty foreign and out of date to my modern ears.  Ok, I know I am not making Catholics look good here, but hear me out!
Ordering my materials for the class, an RSV Bible, our binder with all the study materials, and a Catechism  was exciting!  I will embarrass myself even further here and admit that I had never read the Catechism of the Catholic Church either.  I would love to blame this entirely on the RCIA program I attended before converting, but I would be lying if I didn't say I might have had some reservations about what I may find inside that huge thing, ha! But nobody told me either that what I was professing to believe when I got confirmed was all in there either. I probably would have changed my mind if that were the case! 
Anyway, I did my homework for the first class and a lot of the questions pertaining to the gospel reading would refer me not only to the Bible but to the Catechism as well.  I realized "Wow, you mean the Catholic Church and all these "rules" it has actually has a lot to do with the Bible?"  I was intrigued.  I literally couldn't put my Catechism down for a couple of weeks. I felt like I had discovered a gold mine.  Seriously. Then, when I was in class I noticed God's Word really started speaking to me, almost jumping off the page and right into my heart.  It was like a door was opened that previously I didn't have the key to.  The Bible, the Church, Christ Himself. It all started to seem cohesive and relative to my life.  From that moment on, I craved God's Word and the Sacraments for the first time in my life. And even more profound, I felt the presence of Christ in my life. Learning about my Faith made me realize what a gift it is and made me want to learn more.  Two years later, I feel the exact same way. 
Another thing I didn't anticipate was the friendship and support I would experience with the other women in my class. These women, especially the class leaders, were like no women I had ever known before.  They were wives and mothers, completely and lovingly dedicated to Christ and their vocations, always trying to better themselves.  I was drawn by their example and it made me re-evaluate how I was living my life.  Was I living what I professed to believe?  Was I striving for holiness?  I've read that true friends help you get to heaven.  If that is true then these are some of my best friends, even if I only see them once a week for an hour.  We have laughed and cried together and really inspired each other to be authentic Christian women.
The one thing I've learned that I would like to get out there.  If you are a Catholic and you aren't reading or studying the Bible you are not going to have the tools you need to be a faithful Catholic Christian.  Yes, Sacred Tradition is important, vitally important, but the Bible is just as important. Consult the Catechism of the Catholic Church to see how they are related to each other and how they form the foundation of our faith.  I think Bible Study, whether in a group or alone, is indispensable to growth in the spiritual life of a Catholic.  Especially so you can defend your faith and the biblical truths of Catholicism.  There are many great resources to help you; here are a few of my favorite resources; the last two books are by Patrick Madrid, a wonderful Catholic Apologist:


Ignatius Catholic Study Bible

Where Is that In the Bible?

Does the Bible Really Say That?

Other resources:

http://www.cssprogram.net/   This is the Scripture Study Program for Catholics that is highly recommended and that we use at my church.

http://www.catholic.com/  A major Catholic apologetics site, with lots of forums for discussion.  They also have a wonderful book catalog.

                   "Ignorance of Scripture is Ignorance of Christ."  - St. Jerome, 4th c.

Joy vs. Happiness

I want to share Jennifer Fulliwer's thoughts from her fabulous blog Conversion Diary on the difference between joy and happiness because it's exactly my experience and well, she's just a much better writer and blogger than I will ever be! Enjoy my favorite Catholic blogger ever, a former pro-choice atheist and now a Catholic wife and mother pregnant with her fifth child in six years:

Joy is something different than happiness, and it’s a whole lot different than surface-level pleasure or physical comfort. It’s something divine in origin, not subject to the ups and downs of human emotions, a kind of ecstatic contentment and explosive peace that can only come from contact with the Source of all life and love himself. I may have more challenges now than I used to, but they also don’t bother me as much as they would have before. When I would be in a mildly bad mood in my old life, it was like my discontent would sink right down to my bones. There was nothing to pad my soul, so even the slightest bumps in the road would rattle me to the core of my being. Now it’s like my soul is bubble-wrapped with joy. Even on the worst day, there’s only so much that my worldly circumstances can get me down. Sure, I still notice and feel and dislike the bad emotions, but they no longer have the power over me that they once did, because underneath it all, where there was once nothingness, there is now joy.

It’s a beautiful thing. But here’s the catch: the more intimately we know Christ, the more joy we’ll have…but Christ is the very embodiment of self-sacrifice, of pouring out oneself for the sake of others. In other words, going to fancy meetings in skyscrapers and driving a nice car and hosting luxurious parties are probably not going to bring you a whole lot of joy. But living a life ordered toward the service of others will. So, even though I have a long way to go in the selflessness department, I make a whole lot more sacrifices for others now than I did before my conversion. And I’m not joyful in spite of that fact, but because of it.

Earthly rewards

When it comes to motherhood, I tend to be hard on myself.  I am a very idealistic, perfectionistic type.  As for my temperament I am a "melancholic", according to Catholic tradition.  So, naturally that would make me hard on my children as well.
I always wonder if I'm doing it right since with a three and a half year old there is nothing predictable or set about her ways.  I'm constantly thinking, is this just how they are at this age or am I making her crazy?!  Well, after a couple of days of some regressive behavior on her part and a little more spanking on my part I got my answer tonight.
My children were fed, bathed and in their pj's playing with their new train track and I had just cleaned the kitchen, even mopped the floor, so I was feeling very good about my day.  Note to anyone who isn't a stay-at-home-mom: yes, this is a huge accomplishment in our world! I really couldn't have been more content at that moment which proves to me that this is my vocation for sure.  Then Betty June comes up to me and hugs my leg and says "You're a good Mommy." I had to ask her to repeat herself because I wasn't sure I heard her right.  When she said it again tears welled up.  I hugged her and said how happy that made me and that I wanted to be the best mommy I could be because I loved her so much.  She promptly said "And Jesus loves you, too!"  It was like she read my mind because I could never be a good mom or love my children like I do if I didn't know his love first.  This exchange touched me deeply because she's never said anything like that before or even told me she loved me.  She's just not the affectionate type.
When I had Betty June more than three years ago, I did not know God or his deep love for me.  And you can't give love that you haven't been given yourself.  I had a very hard time being a mom and bonding with her.  I will be totally honest. I was terrified, even resentful.  I went through a crisis from the time she was one until I got pregnant with Luke a few months later.  As I look back, I took her for granted because I was that selfish and lost.
So many good things and people came into my life after that and I believe with all my heart that God orchestrated it all because he knew I was finally ready to return his love. I quickly and eagerly came to know God's love and his plan for me. I was made new and saw everything in a new light.  It was as if I had been blind my entire life until then.
Now I do everything for Christ, who did the ultimate for me.  I want nothing more than to love Him and others, although I will admit I have a harder time with the others part!  But, even my three year old seems to be aware that my love for her is born of an even greater love...